So, I took a few months hiatus to deal with some unexpected real-life surprises (not all good ones, btw) and take care of my loved ones – I needed some time to take care of myself, as well. Life challenged me the last few months of 2013 – the realization that someone was dying; dealing with the aftermath of my brother’s separation; keeping the sense of normalcy in our family during the holidays; and keeping myself focused and positive.
After several patio-sessions with my husband to vent, discuss, and hopefully reach a point of clarity, I came to this conclusion:
I will no longer give my time to those who have hurt me, ignored me,
or just haven’t invested in a relationship with me.
One may consider this harsh or heartless, and it took many hours and days of thinking this through to realize that a decision that may be so easy for others to make, was not such an easy one for me. But after reflecting over the past year and appreciating the people who bring me joy compared to the “Others”, I saw it as a simple math problem.
Me + Loved Ones = Happiness and Appreciation
Me + “Others” = Disappointment and Frustration
The simple thing to do next was to decide that it was time to let go of the hope that people will carry the same love, respect and value for relationships as I do, and to be ok with that. Not everyone is built the same way; but I know how I’m built and I know what I am able to handle. Don’t be mistaken; this does not mean I will be walking around scowl-faced and angry at the world. No, not at all. It only means that life is too short – why waste time on people who don’t care about you or those who you really wouldn’t choose to be in your life in the first place. My attention and time will go to the supporting cast; everyone else are just like props in the background. The cast of characters play a role [in your life]; the props are just there. Wish them well, let go, and move on. Onward and upward, 2014!